


Treasure

by StoryDweller



Category: Hyouka & Kotenbu Series
Genre: Canon Universe, Confessions, Dating, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Getting Together, Japanese Character(s), Love Confessions, Romantic Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-20
Updated: 2017-07-20
Packaged: 2018-12-04 19:02:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11561382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StoryDweller/pseuds/StoryDweller
Summary: "I could’ve refused meeting her, but who am I kidding? Even without her unrelenting stare which always seemed to bend and break me, I was never able to say ‘No’."This picks up where the last book ends. I don't really know how to summarize this without spoiling it!





	Treasure

**Author's Note:**

> This was a birthday present for an (amazing) friend of mine! She liked it a lot which made me super happy (*•̀ᴗ•́*)و ̑̑ 
> 
> You can (should) check out her art here: http://rubyyelna.tumblr.com/
> 
> I tried to match the style from the novels so it might sound a little different than my previous stuff! This also picks up where the last book ends.
> 
> Have fun reading and enjoy!

_“Oreki-san.”_

_“I’m listening.”_

_“Even though I’m told I can now live freely... Even though I’m told I can choose what I want to do with my life... Even though I’m told that the Chitanda household will be fine somehow, so I don’t have to worry...”_

_Her voice, changing as if descending into self-mockery, muttered one last thing._

_“Even though I’m told I now have wings, what am I supposed to do?”_

_And with that, the storehouse became silent._

_As I thought of the burden that Chitanda has carried thus far, and of the burden she was told she no longer had to carry, I suddenly felt like I wanted to hit something with everything I had. I felt like I wanted to smash it—to injure my own hand and draw blood._

_I looked at my watch: 5:06. In less than four minutes, the bus bound for the cultural center would arrive._

_I had said everything I needed say and done everything I needed to do. The rest, no matter how much it pained me, was for Chitanda to sort out._

_Becoming neither any fiercer nor any gentler, the rain continued to fall. The sound of singing couldn’t be heard from within the storehouse._

 

…

 

Satoshi told me later that she looked like a frail doll on the big stage of the cultural center, singing her solo in an equally frail voice. I felt my heart sting a little at that. It sounded so lonely. I took the bus after hers. I had a feeling that she wanted to be alone for now, even if it took all my willpower to do so.

I tried not thinking too much about it, trying to focus on different things. After all, I meant what I thought that day. Chitanda had to figure it out on her own. But occasionally her concerned face flashed before my eyes, breaking my concentration on whatever I was occupied with.

It has been a week since I last saw her and it was unbearably hot outside. A sticky type of heat, which engulfed you right after being freshly showered.

I put a little fan on my table which blew strands of my hair from my sweating forehead. It was too hot to do anything and it felt like my brain was melting. But maybe Chitanda was feeling better. The weather was hot but nice, maybe she found something to occupy her mind with… No. Probably not. Not as long she hadn’t solved her problem that is. She was determined like that. The rice fields outside of her house were probably a constant reminder too. I wished I could do something to cheer her up.

It was on a Wednesday when the phone rang. I dragged myself away from the TV, which showed some stupid reality show I wasn’t really paying attention to, and shuffled to pick it up. My parents were at work and my sister was away on a trip again. I hope she won’t run into trouble this time but, to be honest, she probably will. She was like that. I yawned while answering.

“Hello?” A short intake of breath was coming from the other end.

“Ah..um. Oreki-san. It’s Chitanda.”

It didn’t surprise me as much as one might think. I have gotten used to the surprise calls by now. They seemed to always come from Chitanda anyway. I nodded until I realized she can’t see me doing that.

“Oh. Yes.”

“I… um… wanted to ask if we could meet up. I really need your help.” She sounded nervous. But it was different from when she asked me to help at the doll festival. It was more like the first time she called me to meet up. Back then she wanted help to find out the truth about her uncle and her breath was hitching in the same manner now as back then. It seemed so long ago. A familiar feeling was starting to spread from my gut into my entire body. I had a hunch what she wanted to talk to me about. My hands got clammy.

Ah, on such a hot day too. I didn’t plan to leave my house today, it seemed like too much of an effort. I could’ve refused meeting her, but who am I kidding? Even without her unrelenting stare which always seemed to bend and break me, I was never able to say ‘No’.

 

She was already there when I arrived at the place. The spoon Chitanda was stirring her tea with knocked lightly on the sides of the cup, echoing quietly in the empty café. Her bangs covered her downcast eyes. They only looked up when I dragged the chair away from the table to sit down.

“Oreki-san, hello. Sorry, to bother you. On such a hot day, too!”

“Don’t worry about it.” She looked pretty, even with a serious expression on her face. I couldn’t help but notice. I looked at her small hands, which clutched the cup desperately like an anchor, as if she might just float away. I ordered some black tea and looked back to Chitanda. Her arms were now hanging limply at her sides.

“How are your holidays?”, she asked. Always so polite.

“Fine. How about yours? I heard you sung really nicely at the festival.”

She blushed slightly. Probably not only because of the compliment. She was probably still embarrassed about what happened.

“It’s about that day, right? That’s why you asked me to come here today.” Chitanda nodded shortly. Rain was falling that day, as if the sky too had been sad for Chitanda, but today the sun was shining from a cloudless sky. I saw some children run by the window from the corner of my eyes. It felt like such a mundane setting, for such a discussion. It was fine when she asked about her uncle. But now that I know what’s awaiting me?

“I thought… I thought, of all people… you could help me.” She finally looked me in the eyes at that, even if only for a split second. That wasn’t like her at all. She normally had a truly unrelenting stare. “You can solve problems so well, after all. Please help me solve this puzzle. I don’t think I can do it alone. I don’t know what to do anymore.”

She seemed so small in that moment. Not in body size but in spirit. This entire thing was eating away at her. Understandably so. One is bound to feel helpless when you suddenly lose a goal you were striving after all your life. The problem is just, that this is not my life we are talking about, but Chitandas. And I am not her… well, what am I to her anyway?

“I don’t think I can help you with that.” Her shoulders quivered slightly at that, but she wasn’t crying. Thankfully. I’m not sure if I could stand it if she’d cry.

“Huh?”

I frowned. “This is something only you can solve.”

“But… but you helped so many other people! You solved their puzzles and problems, you even found out about my uncle. A memory which normally should have been a problem only I would be able to solve too!” I wanted to say something, to object, to reason with her, but Chitanda didn’t stop talking. No, maybe she couldn’t stop.

“You solved problems no one else could solve. Oreki-san, I can’t solve this. I thought about it again and again but I just can’t find an answer.”, her voice broke a little and she got quiet for a moment. “Sometimes it feels like there is no answer. It feels as if my purpose in life truly was taking over the Chitanda household. But now that this is gone, what will I do? How does one live without purpose?”

My tea arrived. I took a sip and burned my tongue. Chitanda is not asking unreasonable questions. It’s just that I don’t know what to say. Anything I’d tell her could push her into a specific direction to look for her purpose. But what if I’m wrong? What if my first guess is not correct, just like my ending for the movie was not correct? What if anything I’d say is just my own interpretation of who Chitanda should be in my eyes? It would be irresponsible of me to just blurt out things like that.

Chitanda was still looking at me with hope in her eyes. I swallowed. This was going to be hard.

“Do you remember what I told you when you asked me about your uncle?” She cocked her head. “I will not take responsibility for what you intend to do.” My fingers were restlessly tapping on my teacup, awaiting her answer. I wanted to speak as little as possible, to not say anything wrong. This was a very delicate situation.

“…but you agreed to help me back then.” Back then? Hm.

“I agreed to take it into consideration. And it was a different situation. Looking for something from the past and seeking a path for your future are two different things.” Did I sound like an old man? I probably did. Ah, embarrassing.

I took another sip. The question about her uncle was different. Right now, Chitanda is asking me for advice, which could influence her entire life. She is asking me for an easy way out of trying to answer it herself. But it’s no use. I already know my answer. Judging the expression on her face, she knew too.

“No. I can’t help you.” As much as it pains me, I can’t. I’m sorry, Chitanda.

We didn’t speak much afterwards. I paid my tea once it became too awkward and my heart was so heavy, it could sink me in the sea like a stone. I remembered being so proud that I accepted her request to solve the secret of her uncle. Now I feel nothing but displeasure.

It was bothersome to some degree. Without having met Chitanda I wouldn’t have such troubles now. But what would it mean to never have met her? First and foremost, the classics club would have consisted of me alone. There wouldn’t have been an anthology either. Overall, not much would have changed in my life. I’d have peace and quiet. One could maybe say, I’d be a lot more boring.

I lied down on my bed and stared up at my ceiling, thinking about everything and nothing at all at the same time.

 

Our third year started sluggishly, there was no other way to describe it. Ibara was just as passionate about her art as before. Maybe even more after finally quitting the Manga Club. She sometimes still sat with us at the Classics Club, but mostly to have some place to draw quietly or maybe do some homework once in a while. Unlike Satoshi who was still slacking with his homework on a regular basis. Ibara always got angry with him for that. That at least never changed.

I don’t think Ibara and Satoshi really noticed the awkward atmosphere which seemed to follow Chitanda and me whenever we were in the same room. They were rather occupied with themselves, not that this was a bad thing. I sometimes caught Satoshi looking at Ibara with an indescribable expression on his face. I was happy for them. But it was hard to not notice how Chitanda visited the club room less and less when I was there. Actually, she generally visited the club room less often than she used to and even when she did visit, she was really quiet.

It has been so long since I heard her say “I am curious!”. Ah, it used to annoy me so much. What has changed since then?

Every time I saw her now, she looked like a shadow of herself. She seemed to space off rather often. I wondered if others saw it too? Her smiles have become too tight, her words too shallow and her eyes were constantly glazed over. Maybe those changes were so minuscule that only I noticed them.

I wished she would look at me again like she used to.

I shook my head. I needed to cut it out. I couldn’t help her, even though I desperately wanted to. I unclenched my fingers which gripped my book too tight, crinkling up the paper. Satoshi was sitting next to me, spacing out while doing his homework. I started packing up my bag.

“I’m going home.”

“Eh, already? I’ll go too then, I don’t want to stay here alone.” What a dishonest answer. He was probably just sick of trying to look as if he was actually doing his homework. That drew a tiny smile onto my lips which disappeared just as quickly as it came.

We walked quietly for a while. The weather was starting to get colder. Soon I’d have to start putting on a scarf again and my breath would paint little clouds.

“Say Oreki… did you notice that Chitanda seems a little off lately?” I looked at him, but Satoshi was looking straight ahead. So I wasn’t the only one. I sometimes forgot how well his perception really was. He often noticed things a lot quicker than me. It’s just luck that I had a talent for piecing together information I was presented.  

“She does.” He squinted at me.

“Do you know anything about that?”, he frowned.

“Why? Do you think it’s my fault?”

“You two don’t talk as much anymore. It seemed like the natural thing to assume.”

I sighed.

“We didn’t fight or anything. Chitanda just has a problem she needs to solve on her own. I don’t think she would appreciate me telling everyone about it.”

“I see.” He crossed his arms behind his head. “Maybe you should try and help her.”

 “She asked me to already. The problem is I don’t think this is an issue I can just solve for her.”

Satoshi squinted at me. Somehow, I felt like an idiot.

“Maybe you don’t need to solve it for her. Maybe you just need to be there for her.”

I blinked. Maybe I really was an idiot.

 

It took four days until I saw Chitanda again. At least in real life. She seemed to occupy my mind regularly lately. When I wasn’t thinking of her, I was thinking of how my life would be without her. And when I am not awake, her smile is following me into my dreams. I shook my head. Maybe I was going crazy.

Her delicate frame greeted me when I opened the door to the club room. She was holding a pen between her thin fingers, a notebook opened before her, but her eyes were turned away and staring out of the window. She didn’t even notice the sound of the door opening. Or my steps when I was walking towards her. She only looked up when I pulled out the chair across from her. It made a horrible squeaking sound and dragged Chitanda away from her thoughts. She looked at me in surprise, as if I had just woken her up from a dream. No, a nightmare.

“Oh! Oreki-san! I…um…”

I sat down and put my bag next to my chair.

“Sorry for interrupting you.”

“Yeah.”

There always seemed to be an awkward silence between us lately. It’s not like I didn’t have anything to say to her. In fact, there were so many things I wanted to tell her. They were running through my head but before I could choose what to say, the moment was over. Maybe she felt the same? I thought about what Satoshi told me. How something this insightful came out of a guy like that was still beyond me. Maybe I should stop trying to give her space and try talking to her. Maybe he was right. Maybe I truly was an idiot. I took a deep breath.

“Did you solve your problem?”

Her face crinkled up in confusion.

“No.”

“Oh. I see.” Silence. Damn it. Think, think, say something! “Do you have any idea yet? Maybe a direction?”

“I… I don’t know. There seem to be impossibly many.”

She stared out of the window again, biting her lip. Right, she was always good in school. Chitandas curiosity sometimes made her appear naïve, maybe a little stupid even. I remember thinking the same of her when we first started talking: ‘How is a girl this good in school but still so dense?’ I realized after a while, that her curiosity is what made her intelligent. Her constant thirst for knowledge even if it’s just a theory for the ending of a movie.

“I am jealous, you know?”, this time she dragged me away from my thoughts. Her soft voice startled me, but she sounded like on the verge of crying. “You know your talents, Oreki-san. You seem to have found some path in life. You might not have asked for it but it opened before you. My path turned out to be a dead end. There is nothing but vast nothingness before me and I don’t have a compass.”

Do I really know my talents? My path in life? All I know right this second is that the expression on Chitandas face pains me more than a punch in the gut. All I know is that I don’t want a life where she is not in it.

“I really hoped you could’ve told me where to go. I hoped you’d be able to tell me who I am.”

“Chitanda…”

Her head whipped around and her wide eyes met mine for a second. Tears were forming in them and her cheeks were dusted in a soft pink colour. Frantically she started to pack up her bag, throwing her pens and notebook in it carelessly.

“I’m sorry, Oreki-san. I didn’t want to bother you with that.”

Bother me? Her skirt fluttered while she was walking away quickly, revealing her milky white thighs. She thinks she’s bothering me? How could she?

I got up so quickly I nearly tipped over my chair and sprinted after her. My legs were moving on their own, leading me where I had to go. I would have never thought I’d ever run this fast just to make someone wait. Make someone listen to me. ‘If I don’t have to do it, I won’t do it.’ That was my motto and it had been that for years. Normally I would have just waited for another opportunity. So why was I running?

What did my sister tell me again? Someone will end my holiday for me. Did Chitanda end my holiday?

…she did.

The last days made that clear to me. I missed her bright smile so much. The expression on her face when I solved a problem. Her smiles and cheeks flushed from happiness, not from crying. It took me a while, maybe I really was this dense, but this time without her… No, with her avoiding me, made me see how much I really felt for her. It wasn’t only her eyes that captivated me. It was her entire self.

“Wait! Chitanda!”

She was already outside of the school building when I caught up with her. My breathing was ragged and sweat was running down my neck. I felt it pooling under my armpits. I didn’t care. I made it. I caught up with her. Chitanda stared at me with a strange expression on her face. Partly shock and surprise, partly something I couldn’t identify. She was already crying. It made my heart squeeze uncomfortably.

“D-did you just run here? Why?”

“I-” My breathing was still heavy. I forgot how exhausting running really was, but I couldn’t bring myself to regret it. I straightened up. “I wanted to ask you something. Please answer me truthfully.”

Chitanda didn’t say anything. She just continued to stare at me with those big eyes of hers.

“Why would you think you’re bothering me?”

“Well um… I…” She took a deep sigh. “I often ask you to solve problems for me. It is natural to get tired of that after a while. Especially, because I know how much you value saving your energy. I’m sorry if I put too much pressure on you all this time. I’m really sorry.”

She started turning away from me. Isn’t this what I wanted? To have peace from the constant questions, her curious stare? If I don’t have to do it, I won’t do it. But what if after all this time, I finally realized what I truly wanted?

“Chitanda.” She stopped walking away but kept her back to me.

“You’re not bothering me. Not now. Not ever, not really. I-“ Do I finally have the guts to say what I wanted to say?

“Let me be the wind under your wings.” I sounded like an idiot, but it felt as if I had to speak exactly these words. I saw her back straighten more as if she was electrocuted. “I cannot tell you who you are or who you are supposed to become. I cannot tell you where to go. I can only help you discover that by yourself.”

I felt my face burning up. This was probably the most embarrassing thing I have ever said in my life, but I wanted her to hear it. I truly wanted her to understand me.

“Let me be the wind under your wings. I might not be able to tell you where to fly, but I will help you find the strength to do so.”

“Oreki…”, she whispered quietly and turned around. Her entire face was bright red. She reminded me a little bit of a tomato that moment, but I bet I didn’t look any better so I just kept quiet. That remark would have killed the mood anyway.

“Let me stay by your side.”, I repeated. Her mouth was hanging slightly open and her bag hung limply from her fingers. I got this far, there is only one step left to take. Even if she didn’t feel the same, even if she were to reject me. Slowly I started walking towards Chitanda only stopping mere centimeters away from her.

Her cheeks were flushed but she stared into my eyes, making my heart sing. It seemed like so long ago that she looked at me with such a bright expression on her face. She swallowed hard and took a deep breath.

“Yes. Please stay by my side, Oreki-san.”

A light smile passed over her cute mouth and I smiled back, my heart beating in my rib cage hard it enough it could break free any second, but I also never felt happier than in this moment. She started wiping away her tears.

Chitanda, I promise to treasure you. I promise to help you and make you find your happiness again. I really like you, Chitanda. I couldn’t say these words yet but I was sure that one day I would find the courage to do so.

 


End file.
